Looking for LUV?

At Southwest Airlines, it is more than their stock ticker symbol. The ticker symbol LUV is more than an honor to it's first flight and headquarters (Love Field in Dallas); more than an ongoing advertising theme since 1971; it represents the loving character of the company.

On Valentine's Day, there's no better way to emphasize customer service than taking a quick look at the company that is the epitome of practicing love as a way of doing business.

The Greatest Need of the Human Heart
Southwest Airlines understands that the deepest need in our human existence is the need to be loved and accepted - and it doesn't change suddenly or mysteriously disappear when their employees walk through the door at work.

Here are some of the lessons Southwest has learned about love - and how they express them:

• Love is action-oriented: at Southwest, love is something employees choose to do because they are committed to the well-being of others
• Love is patient: employees at Southwest get in the trenches with people and endure difficulty or hardship, and they do it without complaining - that's expressing love
• Love is kind and generous: Southwest employees don't look away; they involve themselves and sometimes inconvenience themselves
• Love is courteous: at Southwest, love helps employees  believe in people and look for the goodness of others
• Love is affirming: Southwest believes that when people receive affirmation, they develop the courage to change and the confidence to succeed when they try something new
• Love is compassionate: at Southwest, compassion consists of the capability of identifying with the pain of another person coupled with the desire to relieve it
• Love extends grace and forgiveness: Southwest has created a culture where the norm is to forgive and forget
• Love doesn't guarantee approval: real love comes without conditions; it doesn't depend on anything else. At Southwest, employees are loved without approving of their performance
• Love is tough and gutsy: Southwest believes that actions are motivated by genuine love, and that sometimes the most loving thing you can do for others is telling them the truth - even when it hurts.
• Love embraces humility: Southwest employees believe that when you are okay with yourself and yet not caught up with yourself, you can focus more on the needs of others

How is your organization practicing love?

Want to know more about Southwest Airlines and the secrets of their success? The comments on love found above, along with hundreds of other insights, stories, and suggestions can be found in the book "Nuts!" by Kevin and Jackie Freiberg.

The Greatest Gift You Can Give

By the numbers, Valentine's Day is a commercial gold mine:

• 180 million cards will be exchanged, with 50% of those purchased in the last six days
• 23.8 pounds - per capita consumption of candy by Americans in 2008
• 187 million roses were produced for Valentines Day in 2009

It is what it is, but to just focus on the tangible "gifts" of love is missing the point:

God is the love you are looking for

This is the central point in one chapter of authors John and Stasi Eldredge's latest book "Love & War." Subtitled "Finding the marriage you've dreamed of", it is a very personal and open journey of twenty-five years of marriage.

The book is an ongoing narrative with each of the authors contributing their feelings and thoughts as they reflect on their journey together. Surprisingly candid, often funny, but always instructive, the Eldredges chart out a path that readers can apply to their marriages.

Central to the book is the admonition that marriage is not a bed of roses; it is a struggle of two individuals who have to submit to each other and fight together for what God has called them into. And for me, that's the greatest lesson of this book, referred to in the quote above and illustrated further with these words from John and Stasi:

We live in a love story. We are created for romance and we have an insatiable capacity for it. God gave us such a heart; it was one of his first gifts to us. Our love story starts with God.

If you are looking for a gift for Valentine's Day, the greatest gift you can give to your marriage is a real relationship with Jesus Christ. This is the kindest thing you could ever do for the people in your life - to have somewhere you can turn, someone who loves you and understands. More words from John and Stasi:

...you must understand you are not a well and your spouse is not a well. You are both leaky buckets in search of a well.

God's love is that well. Turn to it often, and drink deeply for a marriage that will honor God's gift to each of you.

"Love & War" is a powerful, personal, and profound journey of two individuals who love God deeply, and therefore love each other deeply. Their story and journey provide an excellent road map for any couple wanting to grow together toward God and each other.

This was book was provided for review by WaterBrook Multnomah.

Love to Live

To conclude “Self-Improvement Week”, I turn to C.S. Lewis and a summary of his book The Four Loves. Originally intended to be a discourse on the John’s statement that “God is Love”, it turned into an examination of the four Greek words for “love” that we translated into one in English.

Affection
Affection (storge) is fondness through familiarity, especially between family members or people who have otherwise found themselves together by chance. It is described as the most natural, emotive, and widely diffused of loves: natural in that it is present without coercion; emotive because it is the result of fondness due to familiarity; and most widely diffused because it pays the least attention to those characteristics deemed "valuable" or worthy of love and, as a result, is able to transcend most discriminating factors.

Friendship
Friendship (philia) is a strong bond existing between people who share a common interest or activity. Lewis explicitly says that his definition of friendship is narrower than mere companionship: friendship in his sense only exists if there is something for the friendship to be "about". He calls Companionship a matrix for friendship, as friendship can rise in the context of both. Friendship is the least natural of loves, states Lewis; i.e., it is not biologically necessary to progeny like either affection (e.g., rearing a child), eros (e.g., creating a child), or charity (e.g., providing for a child). It has the least association with impulse or emotion.

Eros
Eros is love in the sense of 'being in love'. This is distinct from sexuality, although he does spend time discussing sexual activity and its spiritual significance in both a pagan and a Christian sense. He identifies eros as indifferent. This is good because it promotes appreciation of the beloved regardless of any pleasure that can be obtained from them. It can be bad, however, because this blind devotion has been at the root of many of history's most abominable tragedies. In keeping with his warning that "love begins to be a demon the moment [it] begins to be a god", he warns against the danger of elevating eros to the status of a god.

Charity
Charity (agapē) is an unconditional love directed towards one's neighbor which is not dependent on any lovable qualities that the object of love possesses. Agape is the love that brings forth caring regardless of circumstance. Lewis recognizes this as the greatest of loves, and sees it as a specifically Christian virtue. The chapter on the subject focuses on the need of subordinating the natural loves to the love of God, who is full of charitable love. Lewis warns that those who exhibit charity must constantly check themselves that they do not flaunt—and thereby warp—this love ("But when you give to someone, don't tell your left hand what your right hand is doing."—Matthew 6:3), which is its potential threat.

All of us express these different types of love in some way to our family, friends, co-workers, and complete strangers. Remembering that we love because God first loves us, how will you love others today?